At least in the context of electromagnetism, the law of attraction "opposite attracts" applies. However, are there any rules governing a couple's attraction to one another? According to a well-known song from the 1980s, "In a world that is full of strangers," is there a clear set of guidelines that let two people to fall in love?
Is attraction a matter of chemistry?
Scientists believe that molecules known as pheromones are the main cause of attraction between animals of the opposite sex. The most researched aspect of insect behavior to date is the impact of pheromones. Pheromones have been found to be in charge of communication within ant colonies and within the same species, at least in certain tests. It is claimed that the foul smell skunks emit to repel adversaries is a form of pheromone. Some ape species attract possible mates by rubbing urine containing pheromones on their feet. According to some experts, these chemical signals are sent by animals (typically the females) like insects and mammals to inform the men of their species that their genes vary from their own. In order to produce offspring with higher survival rates, this gene variety is crucial. Pheromones have been exploited by the perfume business to make people more sexually desirable to the other sex. For these compounds, animals like musk deer and whales were killed down.
The existence of human pheromones and their function in mate selection have recently become the subject of scientific investigation. The fields of biology, chemistry, genetics, and psychology are rife with divergent opinions. According to the majority of scientists, these either don't exist or, if they do, have little bearing on a man and woman's sexual desire. However, recent studies, like the one carried out by Klaus Wedekind and colleagues at the University of Bern in Switzerland, are gradually forcing these scientists to reconsider their positions. During their ovulation phase, ladies sniffed the cotton shirts of various men as part of their experiment. It was discovered that women liked the scent of men's clothes that shared similarities with their DNA but were genetically distinct. Similar to insects and other mammals, this was done to guarantee their offspring would have superior and healthier traits. Researchers did warn, though, that a woman's ovulation period, the foods men eat, perfumes and other scented body items, and the usage of contraceptive pills can all influence a woman's preference for a masculine aroma.
Does personality figure in sexual attraction?
Yes, but so does your assessment of the character of a possible partner. According to a 2003 study on interpersonal attraction and personality by Klohnen, E.C., & S. Luo, a person's sense of self-security and, at the very least, how they view their partner were found to be powerful predictors of attraction in hypothetical scenarios. What can we infer from this? A particular personality type is preferred by us and draws you to a person. However, your impression of your possible spouse is what draws you to them, regardless of whether the person you are in love with actually possesses that personality or not. This is in addition to the individual's actual personality, which can only be confirmed by sustained intimate engagement. In their unsuccessful relationships, men and women frequently say, "I thought he/she was this kind of person." This could likely explain why.
So how does attraction figure in relationships?
It's likely that you have heard that attraction is a precursor to or a contributing component in a relationship. Most likely, at least initially; nonetheless, a relationship cannot succeed based solely on attraction. You notice someone of the other sex because of that attraction, but when you grow to know them more, attractiveness is only one factor. In long-term relationships, shared ideals, aspirations, and interests gain more significance.
So should I stop trying to become attractive?
Focus on improving your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being rather to just your physical appearance. The first step is still physical attraction. Keep in mind that our biology tends to favor the spouse with the most robust genes. When it comes to your feelings, simply ask yourself if you would want to spend time with someone who is self-conscious. Most likely not! Understanding who you are, your values, beliefs, and aspirations can lead to knowledge. Additionally, don't act like someone you're not. It will only lead to disappointment for both of you if you deceive someone else into believing that you share their values and ideas. Attractiveness is a result rather than an end when you are healthy in every way. According to Klohnen and Luo's research, a person's sense of self-security is important, possibly even more so than their attractiveness. But keep in mind that you should do these things for yourself, not for other people. Only then will you be able to fully utilize your personal beauty.
