The most crucial requirement for success here is unwavering, continuous attentiveness. Being "always attentive to the business of the scene," which Churchill has described as the greatest virtue on stage, is also the most important quality in a business setting. Like your person, your understanding should always be armed. Never enter society with a depressed state of mind. Being completely absent or distraught is a recipe for failure. It has been said that elaborating on your companion's comment is the key to having a productive conversation. Strong-willed men with bookish tendencies and isolated habits seldom thrive in lively colloquialism because they focus on the subject matter and abstract it rather than listening to other people's language and do not develop verbal etiquette. By doing so, he establishes a reputation for being swift and pleasing others by demonstrating that he has taken into consideration their observations.
Assuming that a discussion consists solely of talking is incorrect. It is more crucial to listen silently. According to Mirabeau, in order to thrive in the world, you must be willing to learn a lot of things from people who don't know anything about them. The quickest route to success is flattery, and listening is the most sophisticated and satisfying praise you can give. According to La Bruy, "the wit of conversation consists more in finding it in others than in showing a great deal yourself: he who finds himself and his own wit pleasing in your conversation is perfectly well pleased with you." The majority of men would rather please you than appreciate you, and they are more interested in approval and applause than in instruction or even delight. To gratify someone else is the most delicate delight.
Persuading people of your value is definitely appropriate. However, being utterly impressed by his penetration is the best advice you can give a man of your own.
A social motor is patience. The three components of good fortune are listening, waiting, and being tired.
Good breeding dictates that if there is a foreigner at a dinner party or small evening gathering who does not understand the language being spoken, the discussion must be conducted fully in his language. Never use a language that none of your pals can understand, not even your closest ones. Whispering is worse than this.
Never discuss a private matter that others do not understand with anyone in the organization, such as how that problem is progressing, etc. By doing this, you express your belief that the others are de trop. If the topic agrees, always explain the business you are inquiring about to others if you would like to make such queries.
You should always explain the topic to a new visitor if you are carrying on a conversation you started earlier when they enter.
Be careful while using epigrams or lighthearted sarcasm if there are people in the company you don't know. A man whose father had been hanged could find you very clever. Knowing your business properly is the first requirement for a good conversation.
Another similar rule that should be followed is to avoid talking too well when you do speak. You don't gain much respect from someone else if you make him laugh while also hurting his feelings of self-love. In addition to annoying narcissism, a steady stream of wit wears out the audience too much. A humorous man is a pleasant acquaintance but a tedious companion. According to Mrs. Montagu, "the wit of the company, next to the butt of the company," is the most cruel individual within the organization. Because his hand is full of honors, the next neighbor should not rush down the king of hearts if the oldest hand plays the deuce of diamonds. This is the major duty of discussion, just like you do at whist. I don't enjoy watching a clever guy pull off all the conversational pranks.
Always look at the person you are speaking to, and if there are multiple people around, you will be more liked if you devote a part of your conversation—such as a story or a statement—to each of them separately. The key to Sheridan's endearing demeanor was this. He didn't have many bon-mots.
Being familiar with recent history and current events is essential for having a productive discourse. Being so far behind the rest of the world in these areas is inconvenient.
